[Relegatedz Rankings] The Hottest Around

In 1912, an American scientist named Wilbur Scoville devised a scale to measure the hotness factor of a pepper or other stuff containing the compound capsaicinoid. Capsaicinoid is an irritant for us mammals as it triggers a burning response in whatever tissue it comes in contact with...you know the feeling!!

A rough estimate of the torture you have to induce from a fiery habanero is given in terms of Scoville units, which is basically the amount of times you have to drink water over the frikkin' chili to cut down its effect to zero!!! Kidding!

10. A'ji Dulce

0 Scoville Units

Native to the South Americas, this chili aint worthy to be called a chili. It is sooo sweet you can have a bowl of it for dinner and then brag about it to your friends, 'You know I had a bowl of chilies for dinner last night, god promise!' 



Anytime!

9. Peperoncini

100 Scoville Units

You knew it was Italian didn't you?? Well the Peperoncini doesn't live up to its mafioso name and delivers just a mild punch when you were expecting a full burst of Thompson fire from it. You can take it twice or thrice before feeling a bit of that 'something'.

Why the hell did this shoe show up in our Google Images search for peperoncini?



8. Jalapeño

Spicy? Hell Yeah!!

2500 Scoville Units

Native to Mexico this weirdly named chili is smoked, stuffed with cheese and eaten and jelled into jellies to poison schoolchildrens' lunchboxes; well you can't blame the Mexicans for such patriotic behavior, we would have done the same if we had an indigenous celebrity chili (see pic!). You go into a Mexican restaurant and half the menu is stuffed with jalapeno delicacies Caviche Accapulco, Burrito Casserole...hell they are a bunch of tongue twisters!!!

Well if you have eaten a jalpeno raw then your eyes might water and a little burning can be felt on the tongue. You can walk away harmless from this ordeal.

7. Serrano Pepper

Chilliland!

20,000 Scoville Units

One of the most used chilies in Mexico, Serrano is an uninviting, sharp red pepper common to the eastern Mexican states of Puebla and Hidalgo. It is mostly eaten RAW and packs quite a punch. You might experience a sharp biting sensation on your tongue along with watery eyes and a runny nose. A box of tissues is a must while eating it raw.

6. Cayenne Pepper

Well it does seem sexy :-P

50,000 Scoville Units

This luscious, red chili is named after the city of Cayenne in the French Guinea. However it is the perfect example for the adage "looks can be deceiving" because if you are unlucky enough to get one of these in your mouth you are bound to get some uncontrolled watering of your eyes and a leaky nose and ah! that poor tongue of yours!!  

5. Bird's Eye Chilies



A typical Thai mouse. Notice the
stuff in the background? They are the
Bird's eye chilies!

100,000 Scoville Units

A small round red chilli grown in the former Spanish\ Portuguese colonies of East Asia, Bird's Eye Chili is so named because of its small, almost round shape and because of the fact that it is a personal favorite of birds to eat and disperse. We question why because this little piece of shit (we are not being offensive here...it is known as 'Mouse's Dropping' in Thailand; we wonder how the mice look over there!!) has quite a load of heat in itself. A typical Bird's Eye Chilli can make you sweaty even when the temperature around is close to 10 degrees!!

4. Madame Jeanettes

350,000 Scoville Units



We didn't know Madame Jeanette was
euphemism for 'wrinkled, old woman!'

These innocuously named chilies are so inviting; who would turn down a chili with a name like a hostess on a French prairie? Well you should!! unless you want your ass on fire. These bell pepper like chilies (Michael Jackson's nose-job anyone?) have a very high capsaicin content and once ingested they will make you a sorry piece of shit. Expect some condolences your way as you cry convulsively "Why God? Waaaayyyy have you made this %&@^@^&@$&$&@@$***#%?" And did we mention that you won't be able to taste a thing after the hell load of taste buds you have killed?

3. Red Savina Habanero

"Yeah! I eat it whenever I feel like
eating it. And thats about a 100 times
a day!!!"

1,060,000 Scoville Units

As if the world hadn't got its fair share of ass-scorchers yet, Robert Garcia (we believe he is of Mexican parentage) selectively bred Habanero chilies and produced a badass chili that held the world record for the hottest stuff on our planet (after Gisele Bundchen that is) from 1994 to 2006. Once eaten, it will start with a mild pine-applish taste and then build on from that...and by build we mean it culminates into making your intestinal track a FUCKING LOOP OF FIRE!! Well lets not talk about the mouth here...we bet you won't have one after eating this stuff.

2. Bhut Jolokia

1,100,000 Scoville Units

Just try and eat me you SOB bwahahaha!

This pepper's name literally translates to 'Ghost Chili' and this is not a manifestation of a typically superstitious Indian mind but rather this stuff is truly paranormal in terms of the sting it delivers. A typical bhut jholakia will turn you into a very sorry sight; you will sweat an Indus, you will cry an Atlantic and your innards will turn into the lava from Mount Pinatubo. And before moving on we would like to introduce you to some uses of this stuff...

• It is used for treating stomach ailments; yeah, when the stomach is gone, the defects follow.
• It is used as a 'remedy' for Indian summer heat; by scorching you to hell. Whoever came up with this presumed that the dead feel no heat, well do they?? GENIUS!!
• It is proposed to be used in grenades to 'flush out terrorists' by the Indian Defense Department; by flushing out terrorists they mean scraping out the charred remains of what used to be a terrorist, pretty effective. Pentagon you listen?

1. Trinidad Scorpion Butch T

1,463,700 Scoville Units

Now we know about Devil's
favorite fruit!!

We assume it was once named Trinidadian Scorpion Sting and Butcher of Testicles before it was toned down for the Guinness Book of World Record where it reigns the page for the hottest pepper. This badass chili is grown in Australia by the Chili Factory and the seeds for it are provided by the Hippy Seed Company with Butch Taylor being credited as its discoverer (enough bullshit for a day, by the way I guess the Chili Factory will look quite similar to the Chocolate factory of Willie Wonka's, just replace all those yummy chocolate rivers with molten lava and all the chocolates with this Butch T). 

Well no sane man would try to eat this shit and if one does then we must say he has elephantiasified balls because once the fire escapes the Butch T it will turn you into a blazing mass of protoplasm. And did we mention that you will cry like a bitch as you melt to cult status...and that your grave will be marked with a memorial having a Butch T over two massive concrete balls.

We found this chilli to be the most awesome of all...so it deserved another pic!!

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[Tech Tips] Dirt 3 'Profile Save' Error Fix

DiRT3 has been out for more than a week now. It has been getting positive ratings all over the internet and racing fans and avid gamers want to get a taste of it.

But as it pans out there has been somewhat of a glitch as soon as you start DiRT3; even after you have logged into your Games for Windows Live (GFWL) account DiRT3 won't create a save profile for you and will give you an error that profile creation failed. Stop here!! You don't want to make any progress on the events when you can't save it because although the games runs along after this initial message but you can't save your progress unless and until a profile is availalbe.

There can be two reasons for this problem.

#1 You use Windows in a different language or have a user name in a language other than English.
I don't know why but Unicode characters in your Windows username somehow interfere with DiRT3 creating a 'Save Game' folder for you.
You can solve this problem by creating a Windows account with a name that is in English. I would suggest you copy and paste 'Dirt 3' (without the commas) into your username field. It would fix the problem.

#2 There is a problem with your crack. 
Links updated September 14, 2013
A team/person called Netshow released a crack for DiRT3 before any of the respectable crackers like Reloaded or Skidrow could release a fix. And as it turns out the crack by Netshow has some problem with making the game create a Profile for you.
To fix it it download the archive DiRT3_fix, use relegated007 as password and extract it in the game folder (C:\Program Files\Codemasters\Colin McRae DiRT 3 or a variant), replacing any existing files.
Now use dirt2.original to start the game and it will run fine.

If the original fix fails to work for you then download my Extended_DiRT3_fix and use relegated007 as the password.

I hope this helps. :)

IF YOU WANT US TO WORK ON ERRORS IN OTHER GAMES, YOU CAN DO SO BY DROPPING A COMMENT BELOW!

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[Social Eye] The War Without Bloodshed

The Indian subcontinent got partitioned in August 1947 and two nations ideologically polar opposites of one another came into existence on the world map - India and Pakistan.
From day one differences sprouted between the two on varying levels, may it be marking of the border or the division of resources, the two were never content with each others meager efforts for appeasement so much so that they fought three full fledged wars with each other with further bloodshed being narrowly averted on various occasions.
Come the late nineties, and both the countries had nuclear arsenal up their sleeves which lead to a certain Cold War between the two which exists to this date progressing and regressing from various degrees of animosity periodically. The two try to appear saccharine affront but behind the scenes the same sentiment of deep rooted hatred for one another springs up with far-right parties like Shiv Sena constantly adding fuel to the fire.
The advent of sophisticated weapons in the armory of these arch-rivals also to some extent helped maintain a balance of power between the two that lead to less instances of deteriorating diplomatic ties and the battlefield dragged itself from the plains of Punjab and the snow clad peaks of Kargil to the 22-yard, bare patch of cricket and the glistening AstroTurf of field hockey. War got confined to sporting arenas with the intensity still there as it became a matter of salvaging national pride rather than fighting for the ultimate regional superiority. Games between the two are not games anymore and have never been so, they are more like ruthless gladiator battles of the Colosseum, full of ferocity, vehemence, emotion and partisanship.

You see I am biased...there is no point going objective in an Indo-Pak encounter

The game of cricket is the most widely and wildly followed sport in the subcontinent. One can easily infer from this statement that cricket matches between India and Pakistan are no simple business...they are a multidimensional contest culminating into surprising levels of raw emotion so much so that patients suffering from heart and blood-pressure abnormalities in both countries are advised to stay away from these encounters.
These matches are fervently followed and the build-up is normally awe-aspiring which is, lately, compounded by the fact that India and Pakistan haven't played bilateral contests in the subcontinent after the relations between the two hit a new low in the wake of the 2008 Mumbai terror attacks. Now the matches are even more closely followed with Masjids and Mandirs reverberating with prayers prior to every match.
One such match is scheduled to be played in Mohali, India on March 30th 2011 with stakes possibly higher than ever before - it is the semifinal of this year's cricket world cup!! Tournament organizers couldn't have asked for anything better.
The match is touted as the final before the final and the path to the anticipated match is littered with an amazing buildup; news bulletins spend half their time on presenting news pieces about the game, sports channels show the promos a zillion times a day, Facebook is dotted with nationalist statuses and DPs and mobile inboxes are inundated with patriotic SMSs. In short, this tie has captured the imagination of the Indians and Pakistanis alike an it lingers over the subcontinent as a dark storm cloud in a scorching summer - the difference being that after roaring along for a few hours it will drench only one of the two sides with the cold, soothing water of victory.

Stats and Trivia

• Pakistan and India met in four WorldCup clashes prior to this one (1992, 1996, 1999 and 2003) with India standing victorious on all occasions.
• From 1978-2009, the two teams competed in 119 ODIs with Pakistan winning 69 and India winning 46.
• In the period of 2000-2010, the rivals faced off in 41 One Day Internationals with Pakistan again leading with 22 wins compared to India's 19.
• In the 4 Day/Night matches played in India since 2004, Pakistan won 3 and lost 1.
• Pakistan played India in PCA Stadium, Mohali on 2 occasions and won both times.
• Sachin Tendulkar is yet to score a century on this Mohali wicket but averages the most among current Indian and Pakistani players in D/N matches at this ground - 69.50 runs per inning with a high score of 99.
• The leading wicket taker in D/N matches at PCA, Mohali is Harbajhan Singh with 9 scalps but surprisingly so, save for Saqlain Mushtaq, the rest of the top 10 wicket takers are all fast bowlers.
  

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The QuarterFinal Scenario

So after today's game between the West Indies and India, the Quarterfinal stage of WC 2011 is all set to dazzle. Eight top teams from the two preliminary groups will be up against each other in scintillating clashes across the subcontinent. Lets have a look at a brief overview of these quarterfinal battles...

Quarterfinal #1 (C)
Wednesday 23rd March
Pakistan vs. The West Indies
Sher-e-Bangal Stadium, Mirpur, Bangladesh
Start Time: 13:30 PST, 14:00 IST, 14:30 BST, 08:30 GMT
Head to Head: (48), (64) (1975-2011) --- (16), (8) (2000-2011)
Prediction: 65% Pakistan, 35% West Indies, 0% Tie/No Result
Weather: Clear

Quarterfinal #2 (E)
Thursday 24th March
India vs. Australia
Sardar Patel Stadium, Ahmadabad, India
Start Time: 14:00 PST, 14:30 IST, 15:00 BST, 09:00 GMT
Head to Head: (35), (61) (1975-2011) --- (13), (29) (2000-2011)
Prediction: 55% India, 45% Australia, 0% Tie/No Result
Weather: Clear

Quarterfinal #3 (D)
Friday 25th March
South Africa vs. New Zealand
Sher-e-Bangal Stadium, Mirpur, Bangladesh
Start Time: 13:30 PST, 14:00 IST, 14:30 BST, 08:30 GMT
Head to Head: (30), (17) (1975-2011) --- (19), (10) (2000-2011)
Prediction: 70% South Africa, 30% New Zealand, 0% Tie/No Result
Weather: Clear

Quarterfinal #4 (F)
Saturday 26th March
Sri Lanka vs. England
R Premadasa Stadium, Colombo, Sri Lanka
Start Time: 14:00 PST, 14:30 IST, 15:00 BST, 09:00 GMT
Head to Head: (7), (8) (1983-2011) --- (6), (3) (2000-2011)
Prediction: 65% Sri Lanka, 30% England, 5% Tie/No Result
Weather: Cloudy, Scattered Showers

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WorldCup Match Reviews (Part 4)

PAKISTAN vs AUSTRALIA

The sparkling unbeaten streak of the Aussies at WorldCup was finally brought to an end by the team that last beat them at this grand stage, Pakistan. A superb all round display by the Greenshirts, barring a few blemishes, saw them down Australia in a colorful and nerve wrecking affair at the R Premadasa in Colombo. It was the first loss of Australia in 34 WorldCup games since they went down to the same opposition at Headingley, in the previous millennium. This victory means a lot to a capricious Pakistan side that has oscillating between both extremes in this WorldCup, being stupendously good on a day and miserable on another. This win will provide just the thrust and the momentum required by this Pakistan side going into the knockout stages, this victory will give them the believe that they have got what it takes to lift the glimmering, golden Cup...

Australia: 176/10 (46.4 overs) ---  Brad Haddin 42, Michael Clarke 34 --- Umar Gul 3-30
Pakistan: 178/6 (41 overs) --- Asad Shafiq 46, Umar Akmal 44* --- Brett Lee 4-28

Match Rating: **********

Shot of the Match: Umar Akmal lifting a Johnson ball over mid-on for a one bounce four. Umar Akmal was trying breaking the shackles down at Colombo and this stroke was just another step towards it. Johnson was finding his lost rhythm and constantly bowling a nagging off-stump line from around the wicket. Umar Akmal played and missed a few but then came the flamboyance, he shuffled outside off stump, took a step towards the ball and smacked it over the mid-on fielder almost for a six as if it was a leg-stump half volley. Johnson was left dumbfounded.

Delivery of the Match: Australia had found a little opening as Brett Lee had removed YK, effectively ending the 53 run stand for the third wicket that threatened to make a meal of the chase. But still a load of work had to be done as Pakistan's middle order rock, Misbah-ul-Haq, made his way out and took guard. Lee steamed in with new vigor and bowled a perfect delivery to the veteran. It landed on good length outside off-stump, reared up and kissed the Misbah's bat through to the wicket-keeper. Lee was pumped up and followed through with his signature hill-jump. The contest had suddenly becoming alive.

Catch of the Match: After all of what we have seen from Kamran Akmal, the granite-hand wicketkeeper, it was refreshingly good to see him pouch a difficult take to dismiss Ponting. Hafeez had bowled a regulation off-spinner close to Ponting, but with the dismal run of form he is in, he went on to cut it. Mistake! A sharp deviation flew off his bat's top edge and Kamran did well to cling on to it, thanks to the webbing.

Runout of the Match: The only runout in the game was the disastrous mixup between Clarke and White just as they looked to steady the ship. Clarke clipped a bowl off his pads straight to Misbah-ul-Haq at backward square-leg and called for a single that wasn't there. White responded to the call but it proved to be a mistake as Misbah threw a perfect through to Kamran behind the stump who disturbed the woodwork with White well short of the popping crease.

Innings of the Match: Umar Akmal, Brad Haddin, Younis Khan and Micheal Clarke all played short innings that proved very valuable in the end but Asad Shafiq's calm 46 from 81 balls steals the accolades here. His perfectly paced innings is the quintessence of how one should bat when you have the deliveries on your side. A dose of his Buddha-like patience at the crease was the ultimate prescription to soothe the frayed nerves in the Pakistani dressing room. In short his innings was the anchor of Pakistan's run-chase that effectively helped the brittle Pakistani batting order evade another implosion.
  
Bowling Spell of the Match: The three-pronged Aussie pace attack which many consider to be the best in the tournament was at its agonizing worst, save for one man, Brett Lee. His fiery, gallant effort of 4-28 from 8 testing overs all but took the match away from Pakistan. The only thing he required was a back-up effort from his fellow pacemen, which they failed to provide, otherwise it would have been a match-winning spell of ruthless, Aussie-minded fast bowling.

Partnership of the Match: The 5th wicket stand between Umar Akmal and Asad Shafiq can be labelled as a match-winning partnership for this particular encounter. The Aussies had their tails up after removing Misbah and Younis from consecutive deliveries and were looking to push the initiative even further. In this scenario Umar Akmal sent them back to their initial position with scintillating, disdainful hitting, meanwhile finding good support in Shafiq who looked to give the strike back to the aggressive Akmal every chance he got.

Disappointment of the Match: The biased commentary by the grumpy Ian Chappel. Here are some excerpts. 
Whining after Afridi castled Steve Smith "I don't like Afridi's celebration for a couple of reasons. First, he hasn't done much to get the wicket, the batsman has helped me. Second, I don't think it is good with his team-mates, he just stands there in the middle of the pitch with his arms raised."
Showing how much of a sore loser he is as the Pakistani team formed huddle after bowling out Australia for 176 "They should walk off and think about getting the target rather than congratulating themselves on a job half done. This is useless stuff."
Another reason to doubt his mental health and objective commentary as he could not stand the belligerent Umar Akmal tearing the Aussie bowling attack apart "I think the school in which Umar Akmal studied removed the page from the dictionary that had the word careful in it."
Now how many of you see this Aussie idiot fit for international events? 

Though after the Match: How could Afridi be such a shrewd tactician? 

The Match in Photos:
 

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